Saturday, October 5, 2013

Second Chances

A second chance. We are always hearing that in the world around us.
"She decided to give him a second chance." 
"They decided to give the restaurant a second chance."
However, no matter how often we decide to give something a second chance, do we truly give it a chance?

No before you go on trying to correct me or say that I didn't type that right, I want you to think about it. Do we really give things a true chance to succeed or do we already have presumptions about how something will turn out? Personally, I have seen this subject go either way and in some cases, people can really lose a lot with deciding on a second chance. On the flip-side, I have never seen someone gain so much from a second chance.

One time we went to a popular restaurant for a family outing. As we walked in, we could just tell that it wasn't going to be the experience that we were hoping for but since we were there already, we decided to stick it out. After checking in at the hostess station and being told that it would be about a ten minute wait, we took our seats in the waiting area. Well, ten minutes came and went and still, we were sitting there. Twenty minutes, thirty minutes and then forty-five minutes passed and still no table even though there ones that we could see that had been vacant for ten minutes or more. Finally, after about an hour of waiting, we are seated and the server comes to take our drink order. Now, maybe she was having a bad day and had just broke up with a boyfriend or something but this girl was rude from the start. She was put out by any request that we had, acted like we were wasting her time and gave the message that we shouldn't try to even ask about certain dishes or we would become involved in a food fight of some sorts.

Finally, the food came and with the luck that we were having that night, it was completely wrong. Tomatoes were on the burgers that were just supposed to have meat and cheese or the meat wasn't cooked to the specifications ordered. Of course, we did what any other customer would have done and politely called our server over. Once explaining what had happened, it must have been the last straw because she went ballistic. She told us that she was right and took the order down correctly, that we were in the wrong for being so picky in the first place and then instructed us that we should just eat quietly and leave.

Now, after an experience like that, would you personally ever consider going back to that restaurant? Would even remotely think that you would ever spend money there again? What about second chances? If you did go back, would you be so consumed with how the staff treated you, how messed up your order was or how many minutes extra they made you wait until you could be seated? Or would you be willing to give them a genuine second chance, holding nothing in reserve about your previous encounters?

Eventually, we did go back to that restaurant and do you want to know what happened? As we approached the hostess station, we explained our previous experience at their establishment. To describe the look on her face would be equivalent to uttermost embarrassment. Not for anything that she had done personally but for the torturous time that we had been through in the past for the place that she was now working. After explaining, things just seemed to click. We were seated immediately, even with a large group. They cheerfully and dutifully pushed tables together and sat us in a prime spot of the floor. Two senior servers instantly came and recorded our orders and then proceeded to tend to our every whim. In a very timely manner, our food came flying out of the kitchen and within minutes of ordering, we were digging into our correct orders.

As the night went on, the general manager approached our table and offered his most sincere apologies for the events that had unfolded in the past. He even ended offering our whole meal on the house and then packing up dessert for us to return home with. He told us that if we ever have anything else that we would need in the future, he would make sure it was taken care of.

We have been back to that restaurant many times and plan to continue to go for a long time yet.

Now... Would we have ever known what change could have been made if we had never decided to give them a second chance? Would we know that they had changed all the parts that were negative to better serve their guests? Would we have known we would gain a great standing with the management and now consider them our friends? The answer is no. We would have continued on to be bitter about what had happened and never have gone back. If we had been back, we would have been sour the whole time and made the environment undesirable for ourselves, no matter how good the staff might have been. It would eat at us every time we saw any advertisement from them or seen their store as we drove past it.

Second chances are great but they are only great if they are true second chances. Nothing can be held in reserve. No preconceived notions can be brought into the setting.

Next time you find yourself with the choice of whether to give something or someone a second chance on something, decide whether you are going to have in your mind the outcome before they even begin or if you are truly going to see what happens and just go with it for the ride. Life is not about judging people and things based on what they have been in the past but by enabling them to become something great in the future.

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